When Jamie Laing and Spencer Matthews sat down for their first honest conversation in over two years, the silence between them wasn’t just empty—it was heavy with two decades of shared history, public embarrassment, and quiet heartbreak. The emotional exchange, recorded across two podcasts on September 23–24, 2025, marked the first time the Jamie Laing and Spencer Matthews had truly spoken about the fracture that ended their friendship—a bond forged on Made in Chelsea and cemented through late-night pub crawls, reality TV chaos, and the kind of intimacy only people who’ve grown up on camera can understand.
The Wedding That Broke Everything
It started with a newspaper. In early 2023, Spencer Matthews opened The Daily Mail and saw photos of Jamie Laing’s London wedding. Friends. Family. Colleagues. But no Spencer. Not even a text. "I thought we were best friends," Matthews told Jamie Laing on the Great Company podcast. "I didn’t even get a call. I found out through a gossip site. That’s when I knew something was broken. Not just distant—gone." Laing, 35, admitted he hadn’t meant to exclude him—but didn’t know how to say so. "I was overwhelmed. Planning a wedding is like trying to build a house while it’s raining," he said. "I thought I’d talked to you. I thought you knew. I didn’t realize I hadn’t." The hurt festered. When Laing’s stag do came around, Matthews didn’t show. "I didn’t go because I was scared," he confessed. "I’d been sober for a while. I didn’t want to be around drinking. And I didn’t know if I’d be welcome." Laing didn’t push. "I thought he didn’t want to be there," he said. "I didn’t ask. That was my mistake."The Ultramarathon and the Silence That Followed
Spring 2024. Laing ran 100 miles across the Lake District. He’d trained for months. His followers cheered. His family waited at the finish line. But Spencer? No sign. No post. No message. "I didn’t invite him," Laing said plainly on the podcast. "We weren’t talking. Why would I ask someone who hadn’t spoken to me in months to show up?" Matthews, 37, had planned to post a tribute after the race. "I wanted to say something meaningful," he explained. "Not a quick Instagram story. Something real. But then the articles started—‘Laing and Matthews feud intensifies.’ I didn’t want to feed it. I thought silence was better." It wasn’t. The rumors grew louder. The public assumed hatred. The truth? Neither man knew how to reach out.
Why Men Don’t Talk—Until They Do
The turning point came when Matthews texted Laing: "I think we need to talk. Not on social media. Not through a PR team. Just us." Laing didn’t hesitate. "I thought: if this doesn’t happen now, it never will. And I didn’t want to live with that regret." What followed was raw. Two men, both in their late thirties, sitting across from each other, talking about things they’d never said aloud: anxiety, grief, shame. Laing revealed he’d suffered crippling panic attacks in his twenties—never told a soul. "I thought if I showed weakness, I’d lose respect. Especially on TV." Matthews opened up about losing his brother as a child. "I never learned how to hold space for emotion," he said. "I shut down. I thought being strong meant staying quiet." "Like so many men," Laing added, "we were taught to fix things. Not feel them."Water Under the Bridge
They didn’t fix everything. They didn’t promise to be inseparable again. But they did something rarer: they apologized. "I know I’m not a great friend," Matthews said. "I was selfish. I didn’t make room for you." "My biggest mistake? Not asking," Laing replied. "I assumed you knew how I felt. I didn’t say it." They agreed the rift was "water under the bridge." Not forgotten—but no longer a wound. The Great Company episode, released September 23, 2025, ran 68 minutes. The Untapped episode, posted the next day, was 57 minutes. Both were uncut. No edits. No music swells. Just two voices, tired but honest, finally speaking.
What This Means for Male Friendships
Their story isn’t just about two reality stars. It’s about a generation of men raised to bottle things up. To "man up." To pretend silence is strength. The fact that they chose podcasts—mediums built on intimacy, not performance—was telling. They didn’t do a TV interview. They didn’t write a statement. They sat, listened, and let the tears come. "We’re not going to be best friends again overnight," Matthews said. "But we’re going to try. And that’s enough." Laing added: "Friendships aren’t trophies. They’re work. And some of the best work is the kind you never post about."Frequently Asked Questions
What caused the rift between Jamie Laing and Spencer Matthews?
The rift began in 2023 when Spencer Matthews learned through The Daily Mail that Jamie Laing had not invited him to his London wedding, despite believing they were "best friends." The situation worsened when Matthews didn’t attend Laing’s stag do or ultramarathon finish line in 2024, and neither man communicated their feelings, leading to public speculation and emotional distance.
How did they finally reconnect?
Spencer Matthews initiated the reconciliation by reaching out to Jamie Laing to record a podcast episode together. Laing agreed, saying friendships were "worth fighting for." Their two-hour conversation across both podcasts allowed them to openly address their miscommunications, personal struggles, and regrets for the first time since the fallout.
What role did mental health play in their estrangement?
Both men revealed long-hidden struggles: Laing suffered from crippling anxiety in his twenties but never spoke about it, while Matthews coped with childhood grief over his brother’s death by emotionally withdrawing. Their inability to express vulnerability—common among men raised in traditional masculinity norms—deepened the rift before they finally opened up on camera.
Are Jamie Laing and Spencer Matthews friends again?
They don’t claim to be "best friends" again, but they’ve moved past the anger. Both described their relationship as "water under the bridge" and committed to rebuilding trust slowly. They emphasized that their reconciliation wasn’t about returning to the past, but about choosing to be present for each other moving forward.
Why did they choose podcasts to reconcile?
Podcasts offered a private, unfiltered space without the pressure of live TV or public scrutiny. Both men had hosted podcasts together before their fallout, making it a familiar and emotionally safe medium. The format allowed for extended, unedited dialogue—something they felt was necessary to truly heal.
What’s the significance of their reunion for reality TV culture?
Their reconciliation challenges the stereotype that reality TV friendships are performative or fleeting. Laing and Matthews’ bond began in 2006 on Made in Chelsea and endured through personal crises, public scandals, and professional highs. Their willingness to show vulnerability on camera offers a rare, authentic model of male friendship in an industry built on drama.